I found this in my email "draft" box, unsent. It was dated Feb 2008 several months before my divorce.
I want to post this now.
~~~
To my dear friends, This morning, I was in rapture.
I've been in the wilderness for a few weeks now... wandering on a journey for answers that I've needed to find. I think I'm finding them in ways that I've always known. It's a feeling that's difficult to put into words, better if it is expressed in song or dance.
I'm boiling inside with the intensity of spiritual love and the steam is rising to open my heart more. I've been soaring in spirit and many of you have joined me in these adventures.
One of the questions I've had is not why but HOW? How does one express this love? Is there a way to do so purely....allowing the intensity of spirit to grasp you in its ocean currents and take you for the ride of your life?
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And you were the one that kept saying to me in those early years.....
"I don't understand what you mean about this all encompassing love."
Now you have met and surpassed where I was. Wonderful!
I've had a few really difficult days. It seems to come in cycles and then moves out of the way. Thank heavens!
I yearn for a time when the strife or what feels like taking steps backwards is gone completely and is willingly filled with love and rapture.
Now it's me, that's trying to grasp just what is this love and rapture and how do I manage to wrap it around me.
Susanne
Just as I had finished commenting here, I found a fitting answer to my own quarry about life. I share it here....
"If one reaches the point where understanding fails, this is not a
tragedy. It is simply a reminder to stop thinking and start
looking. Perhaps there is nothing to figure out after all; perhaps
we only need to wake up."
- Thomas Merton -
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